Post all that shit that makes you feel like you're living in some sort of dystopian scifi horror
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no more snow days, now kids can learn online
ha ha ha
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FBwZtuJtMw[/video]
Quote from: rachel on May 14, 2021, 06:28:15 PM
no more snow days, now kids can learn online
Most schools get budget based on attendance. Snow days are lost income, for an institution that already can't afford to pay teachers, get textbooks, or fix that cracked toilet in the boy's change room. Maybe schools could afford more snowdays (and the "professional development" days teachers used to get when I was a kid) if they could afford stuff like more than one teacher per 25 students.
lol bird grinder go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7D6QI58zZBc[/video]
'Throughout recorded time, and probably since the end of the Neolithic Age, there have been three kinds of people in the world, the High, the Middle, and the Low. They have been subdivided in many ways, they have borne countless different names, and their relative numbers, as well as their attitude towards one another, have varied from age to age: but the essential structure of society has never altered. Even after enormous upheavals and seemingly irrevocable changes, the same pattern has always reasserted itself, just as a gyroscope will always return to equilibrium, however far it is pushed one way or the other.
The aims of these three groups are entirely irreconcilable. The aim of the High is to remain where they are. The aim of the Middle is to change places with the High. The aim of the Low, when they have an aim—for it is an abiding characteristic of the Low that they are too much crushed by drudgery to be more than intermittently conscious of anything outside their daily lives—is to abolish all distinctions and create a society in which all men shall be equal. Thus throughout history a struggle which is the same in its main outlines recurs over and over again. For long periods the High seem to be securely in power, but sooner or later there always comes a moment when they lose either their belief in themselves or their capacity to govern efficiently, or both. They are then overthrown by the Middle, who enlist the Low on their side by pretending to them that they are fighting for liberty and justice. As soon as they have reached their objective, the Middle thrust the Low back into their old position of servitude, and themselves become the High.
Presently a new Middle group splits off from one of the other groups, or from both of them, and the struggle begins over again. Of the three groups, only the Low are never even temporarily successful in achieving their aims. It would be an exaggeration to say that throughout history there has been no progress of a material kind. Even today, in a period of decline, the average human being is physically better off than he was a few centuries ago. But no advance in wealth, no softening of manners, no reform or revolution has ever brought human equality a millimetre nearer. From the point of view of the Low, no historic change has ever meant much more than a change in the name of their masters.'
• Emmanuel Goldstein, THE THEORY AND PRACTICE OF OLIGARCHICAL COLLECTIVISM, Chapter 1 (
Quote from: tawd on May 24, 2021, 06:30:04 PM
... there have been three kinds of people in the world, the High, the Middle, and the Low.
Yeah, nah, just two: those the law restrains but does not protect, and those the law protects but does not restrain.
You can recognize the latter in our culture as those who can "buy their way out" of suffering police action.
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbUntax5A0o[/video]
Quote from: Mozai on May 25, 2021, 04:49:41 PM
Quote from: tawd on May 24, 2021, 06:30:04 PM
... there have been three kinds of people in the world, the High, the Middle, and the Low.
Yeah, nah, just two: those the law restrains but does not protect, and those the law protects but does not restrain.
You can recognize the latter in our culture as those who can "buy their way out" of suffering police action.
i would argue the middle is restrained and protected
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Q: Why is suicide illegal?
A: It's "destruction of government property."
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypbFiNvDa4c[/video]
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jE3KPWwiRz8[/video]
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[video]https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/630599999629295626/854092341416427520/20210614_004102-vid1.mp4[/video]
"Friend Computer reminds you that Happiness is mandatory."
https://petapixel.com/2021/06/17/canon-uses-ai-cameras-that-only-let-smiling-workers-inside-offices/
Quote
Canon has always advocated the concepts of 'laughing' and 'big health', therefore a new experience of smile recognition is specially incorpora
your life is worth $4 million to the govt when designing safety equipment
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6CKltZfToY[/video]
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Not really a meme, just food for thought
Quote01:23 < meeseeks> rachel proposition: the west very badly needs cultural production again that is not tied to or resultant of capitalistic enterprise or the profit motive.
01:24 < meeseeks> and the reason modern society feels darn soulless is because we lost that and it wasnt very long ago that we lost it, all things considered
01:25 < meeseeks> internet meme culture was a resurgence of it, actually, but it got taken over by the brands again
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https://twitter.com/bcmerchant/status/1436421222854631425 (https://twitter.com/bcmerchant/status/1436421222854631425)
"Simply incredible—all 5 of the "third party" privacy and consumer groups Facebook said it consulted before rolling out its Ray Ban AR camera glasses to ensure privacy was "baked in" from the start are *funded by Facebook*. Every single one of them.&quo
[video]https://youtu.be/-SQmWwm93iw[/video]
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_hrTsswfmg[/video]
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Quote from: meleeman on September 14, 2021, 11:08:09 PM
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_hrTsswfmg[/video]
wow very different from shoe0nhead's normal content, I like it
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nAbUHnGFCA[/video]
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Am8WyGZr7PA[/video]
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https://www.cnet.com/news/google-now-charges-government-for-user-data-requests-report-says/
QuoteGoogle is reportedly encountering an increasing number of government agency requests for user information. In response, the tech giant has put a price tag on complying with legal requests for data like emails, location tracking information and search queries, according to a Friday report from The New York Times. Starting this month, Google will reportedly charge $45 for a subpoena, $60 for a wiretap and $245 for a search warrant.
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FqXTCvDLeo[/video]
We see a fashion model -- or maybe a painter's model for romance novels -- wearing only pyjama bottoms and hair that is gel'd and mousse'd into that "just woke up" tussle. Yawn, stretch to flex his chiselled stomach and he pads down the hall of a New York loft. He turns into a door, and the door closes on the camera so the view shows the "Man/Woman" icon that is universally recognized as a bathroom in a public building (despite this being an obvious private home).
Cut to the loft's kitchen, all white paneling with black marble tops and shiny nickel fixtures that have seen no use. A beautiful thin woman is pouring generic-brand breakfast cereal into two bowls, with flawless hair and makeup despite the carefully-careless man's shirt she's wearing as pyjamas (too large for the fashion model we saw earlier). The pretty man walks in from stage left, gives her a chaste peck on the cheek and moves across to the fridge.
"The usual?" she asks, looking at the cereal so the audience knows what she means and the production company can minimize the woman's speaking role.
"Nah, need more fibre, and my potassium count is low," says the model in a voice suspiciously clear for facing away from us. He turns around and places oatmeal and two bananas on the counter next to the woman's pair of offerings.
Cut to the bathroom door again, which opens and the camera pans in to the spotless and unused bathroom. The camera continues to pan on the spotless toilet, until an Apple® logo is visible on the top of the water-tank.
"Apple iToilet™; high quality output comes from high quality intake. Now with iCloud™ compatibility so you can get the same improved service when you need to go on the go.&
https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/uber-knows-when-your-phone-is-about-to-run-out-of-battery-a7042416.html
Speaking to NPR's Hidden Brain programme, Mr Chen said the amount of battery users had left was "one of the strongest predictors of whether or not you are going to be sensitive to surge" – in other words, agree to pay 1.5 times, 2 times or more the normal cost of a journey. Uber knows whether a user is on low battery because the app needs to use that information to go into power
Courtesy of Kiiada on IRC
(https://matrix.wetfish.chat/_matrix/media/v1/download/wetfish.chat/TjcpPpcEsJmnQwWfbolKiIjh)
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Quote from: Mozai on December 28, 2021, 04:12:57 PM
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holy fuck it's real https://www.irs.gov/publications/p17
QuoteStolen property.
If you steal property, you must report its fair market value in your income in the year you steal it unless you return it to its rightful owner in the same year.
To get a true/false result, you must install unknown software in your personal digital assistant, and upload data you don't know into our cloud servers...
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Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day.
Teach a man to fish, buy the pond, tell him he can't have the fish but he can fish for you and you'll sell the fish and give him a very small cut, and he'll say stuff like "I am hungry and my teeth hurt" because nobody wants to fish these days.
-- Tim Ross
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Quote from: Mozai on January 15, 2022, 06:16:21 AM
To get a true/false result, you must install unknown software in your personal digital assistant, and upload data you don't know into our cloud servers...
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i tried to get a covid test locally at rite aid and i couldn't without creating a google account. my last two i didn't need to do any of that nonsense the results were texted or emailed to me. fucking bull shit i dont need an advertising agency ruining my health history or spreading it around or even storing it.
Quote from: here cums the fuck truck on January 28, 2022, 07:15:13 PM
Quote from: Mozai on January 15, 2022, 06:16:21 AM
To get a true/false result, you must install unknown software in your personal digital assistant, and upload data you don't know into our cloud servers...
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i tried to get a covid test locally at rite aid and i couldn't without creating a google account. my last two i didn't need to do any of that nonsense the results were texted or emailed to me. fucking bull shit i dont need an advertising agency ruining my health history or spreading it around or even storing it.
yeah I'm really glad I was able to take a completely analog at home test with no fucking app or anything. I just unscrewed the bottle and put it into the test and swabbed my nose
Despite the convenience of not needing an app, the fucking at home test didn't even work and gave me a false negative when I did in fact have covid lol
Quote from: rachel on January 29, 2022, 09:07:51 AM
Quote from: here cums the fuck truck on January 28, 2022, 07:15:13 PM
Quote from: Mozai on January 15, 2022, 06:16:21 AM
To get a true/false result, you must install unknown software in your personal digital assistant, and upload data you don't know into our cloud servers...
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i tried to get a covid test locally at rite aid and i couldn't without creating a google account. my last two i didn't need to do any of that nonsense the results were texted or emailed to me. fucking bull shit i dont need an advertising agency ruining my health history or spreading it around or even storing it.
yeah I'm really glad I was able to take a completely analog at home test with no fucking app or anything. I just unscrewed the bottle and put it into the test and swabbed my nose
Despite the convenience of not needing an app, the fucking at home test didn't even work and gave me a false negative when I did in fact have covid lol
god that fucking sucks. i thought tests like this were supposed to have a little control strip that told you if the test is good? i have no idea how those work
Quote from: here cums the fuck truck on January 31, 2022, 07:24:59 AM
god that fucking sucks. i thought tests like this were supposed to have a little control strip that told you if the test is good? i have no idea how those work
it did have a control strip, however I got sick with omicron which apparently is harder for at-home tests to detect
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(this is not far off. Not far off enough.)
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smE4_jXsABs[/video]
I know where my next Shadowrun adventure's gonna be: the Taipei 101 building.
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wholesome loving family memes <3
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If you do nothing, and we do nothing, you owe us money.
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friend told me the name of a subreddit full of people "who miss the point by a Planck length"
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https://store.steampowered.com/app/1507780
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I've heard the first three said unironically.
Quote from: Mozai on March 12, 2022, 05:53:37 PM
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I've heard the first three said unironically.
yikes
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Looks like a normal grocery store.... then you look up
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYvhC_RdIwQ[/video]
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ayg4shWKkw[/video]
jesus.exe take the wheel!
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(https://s.mltshp.com/r/1NT4L)
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Quote from: rachel on August 23, 2022, 09:38:52 AM
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the people advocating this on the internet are almost always in the 0.01% and just in denial about how comfortable they are
these memes don't come from compassion they come from entitled greed
Danish prison cells are nicer than the bachelor apartments I can afford.
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"Kids these days aren't like when I was young."
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another civic official who didn't play Simcity... but at least he knows longer commutes are terrible.
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Quote from: Mozai on October 17, 2022, 05:52:53 PM
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holy fuck why even have it in the office
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKKjs7PtHZo[/video]
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Quote from: rachel on May 24, 2021, 03:52:38 PM
lol bird grinder go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7D6QI58zZBc[/video]
Oh Boy I Can't Wait To Enjoy The Fresh Taste Of
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Quote from: nepnep on December 07, 2022, 07:42:58 AM
Quote from: rachel on May 24, 2021, 03:52:38 PM
lol bird grinder go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7D6QI58zZBc[/video]
Oh Boy I Can't Wait To Enjoy The Fresh Taste Of
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DID YOU KNOW? Humans run on just about anything!
Friendly reminder that everything you see here is only what's been successfully documented.
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y94vLwjKDGQ[/video]
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtV33YSKOJk[/video]
(https://mltshp-cdn.com/r/1OJTQ)
(https://feed.vance.land/files/f97b5175-2472-45ef-a943-d984c20fc3c1)
From a year-old article: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30347719 (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30347719)
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Quote from: nepnep on February 03, 2023, 08:23:07 AM
From a year-old article: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30347719 (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30347719)
Once reddit or youtube become popular enough, then the grifters will fill those with copy-pasted spam too...
[video]/upload/109f7fe0-0d48-62bd-97ec-a6db4fa8bc84.mp4[/video]
Quote from: kayimbo on February 05, 2023, 08:32:11 AM
[video]/upload/109f7fe0-0d48-62bd-97ec-a6db4fa8bc84.mp4[/video]
that's some shit right there, is that a real presentation or an onion video???
thats real https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/world-economic-forum-speaker-touts-technology-that-allows-your-boss-to-monitor-your-brain-activity
Big stuff!
[video]https://bae.st/media/06895f41ea20e3029e6f0bba79387441512b18374c7d7012ce9d75d766619a50.mp4[/video]
(https://mltshp-cdn.com/r/1OL86.jpg)
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Quote from: nepnep on February 09, 2023, 02:30:59 PM
Big stuff!
[video]https://bae.st/media/06895f41ea20e3029e6f0bba79387441512b18374c7d7012ce9d75d766619a50.mp4[/video]
compelling concept, honestly I don't think this is a joke / meme
Rachel, I think you might like this channel. (She's got the same type of humor as you.)
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lm0vHQYKI-Y[/video]
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i have anxiety about youtube or other big sites shutting down. we rely on them so much, and they can close at the drop of a hat should they choose to. they're not like government facilities -- they don't stick around 'cause the law says so, they just stick around for the money. if the money ever goes elsewhere, god knows what could happen!
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2sDx0Y_I-k[/video]
Quote from: rachel on February 21, 2023, 07:02:58 PM
Quote from: nepnep on February 09, 2023, 02:30:59 PM
Big stuff!
[video]https://bae.st/media/06895f41ea20e3029e6f0bba79387441512b18374c7d7012ce9d75d766619a50.mp4[/video]
compelling concept, honestly I don't think this is a joke / meme
it's starting.
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a web of trust would be nice, wouldn't it?
Quote from: nepnep on April 01, 2023, 10:24:42 AM
a web of trust would be nice, wouldn't it?
yes I definitely would prefer a web of trust built on years of real world human interactions instead of paying money to some giant corporation
(https://mltshp-cdn.com/r/1OUL4)
[video]https://youtu.be/IPuZGC0DFr8[/video]
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"Like, I'm not saying that this is a good thing, but it's kind of bleakly entertaining how over the course of my life my skill set as an online researcher has gone from being:
- 1. Hugely valuable in the late 1990s and early 2000s because the discoverability of information in public-facing databases was fucking terrible and nobody knew how to organise anything; to
- 2. Effectively useless throughout the 2010s because search engines enormously and rapidly improved and computer literacy was at an all-time high; and
- 3. Back to being hugely valuable once again because SEO bullshit and the proliferation of AI-generated content have degraded online discoverability back to pre-2000 levels and computer literacy is in accelerating decline due to mobile devices deliberately obfuscating basic functionality so that app vendors can sell it back to you with embedded advertising.
A cool thing about cyberpunk coming true is we got ALL the cyberpunk futures:
- * China: universal surveillance and social control
- * America: cool gadgets and wretched inequality
- * Russia: shadowy plots, covert ops, assassinations
- * Japan: Japan
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From the comments: "you forgot alpha-testing high-speed pedestrian murder machines."
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Quote from: Mozai on June 27, 2023, 10:00:27 PM
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bruh
the cure is not drinking that crap
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Quote from: here cums the fuck truck on July 19, 2023, 02:46:10 PM
Alexandria "problem", "solution", "results"
"More roads is the solution for traffic problems like bigger pants is the solution for obesity."
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Quote from: rachel on August 17, 2023, 12:16:03 AM
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Has he considered that by refusing to drive to his job any more he'd be hastening the collapse of society?
why do we bother with I hate my partner jokes when your boss is right there. s/(wife|husband|spouse)/boss/gi;
Me: I feel fat, can you give me a compliment?
Boss: Can you stay late tonight?
- If you were my [employee] I'd poison your coffee.
- If you were my [boss], I'd drink it.
Arguing with a [Boss] is like reading the software licence agreement; in the end, you'll get in trouble anyways so you just skip to the end and say "I agree."
- Where's your [boss]?
- In the garden.
- I don't see him.
- You have to dig a little.
Want to know what it's like being [employed]? chain yourself to a bear then kick the bear.
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[video]https://youtu.be/zG29C4skboc[/video]
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Quote from: Mozai on February 03, 2024, 07:34:46 PM
[video]https://youtu.be/zG29C4skboc[/video]
Damn this song is a classic, big nostalgia
(https://feed.vance.land/files/5b29a38a-4650-42ee-a1e7-ee9540a60701)
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqqHGgHjgnM[/video]
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[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgaQOR0AnIE[/video]
[video]https://youtube.com/watch?v=I908J9_u0WE[/video]
The Taco Bell® Beefy Five-Layer Burrito™ was first offered in 2009 at a price of $0.89. That same year, US federal rules for minimum wage was raised to $7.25/hour. At that time, this burrito cost 7 minutes and 20 seconds.
Today, that same burrito costs $3.56, and minimum wage has not changed. That burrito now costs 30 minutes 30 seconds. An hour of labour used to feed three or four people, now it feeds one.
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work manager doesn't like the smell of certain foods and calls a meeting to say all meals must be inspected by management before microwaving
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hW53ypwC2Ak[/video]
nobody wants to work anymore
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhBPVXP6Blg[/video]
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big pharma rap
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGhAlNnDDmY[/video]
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Robot in south korea commits suicide because it got bored of cleaning up trash
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-xac4VZZ20[/video]
"Let them eat Flakes: Kellogg's CEO says poor families should consider 'cereal for dinner'"
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/feb/27/kelloggs-ceo-cereal-for-dinner (https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/feb/27/kelloggs-ceo-cereal-for-dinner)
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrvWtyRR6kU[/video]
Sometimes the flavor of the orange juice I buy changes and I wonder what's different. It's not just the oranges being more/less sour. I worry that there had been some sort of mistake at the factory, and thousands of orange juice containers had been contaminated with something that won't kill you, but is certainly unhealthy in a way that shaves days off of the end of your life.
Mass production uses massive vats and silos that aren't accompanied by a human's presence like how the machines are in, say, a small bakery. They aren't monitored, and a mistake on the production line like pigeons getting into a grains silo doesn't kill the company, it is only fixed after several shipments of pigeon infused bread has made it to stores.
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Quote from: rachel on April 12, 2021, 03:58:05 PM
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https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2024/09/ftc-sues-prescription-drug-middlemen-artificially-inflating-insulin-drug-prices
They did finally get around to that! Took long enough...
As a direct consequence of insulin price slashes - companies stopped making insulin.
There's been a shortage of Fiasp (insulin aspart) since July - it was supposed to be over by September. That deadline has now been extended to January. Fiasp is the fastest acting, (formerly premium) insulin on the market - it isn't complex (its just insulin aspart with some niacin and an amino acid) but it is patented - there is no generic.
Levemir is discontinued.
Insulin glargine/lantus is discontinued.
There are constant rolling shortages of most insulins on the market - you simply can't get them sometimes.
Manufacturing capacity has been diverted to ozempic and other weight loss drugs.
For a long time, I had a dream of living on a desolate mountain alone. Then, I had to start getting insulin just to stay alive. Okay, so I can't live on a desolate mountain - I have to have a pharmacy. But if SHTF there is no home remedy, there's no easy way to synth this stuff - its complex and difficult.
Shit hasn't hit the fan but they still just don't want to make it. While still having a corner on the market, patents, exclusivity deals, etc.. no other manufacturer is stepping up. The free market isn't working very well.
here's an article on market forces https://www.statnews.com/2024/05/15/discontinuing-insulin-problematic-trailing-edge-older-versions-keep-it-affordable/
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Quote from: Mozai on November 27, 2024, 05:52:00 AM
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Related: https://www.5snb.club/posts/2023/do-not-stab/
QuoteOver the last 50 years, advancements in peripherals have allowed websites to stab users. A number of industries have popped up to provide SaaS (Stabbings as a Service). Some users have expressed discomfort when a knife is plunged into their chest, and this header allows those users to express their personal preferences.
A user preference can, of course, be ignored by bad actors. However, most stabbings are not done by malicious actors, they are simply law-abiding companies which will gladly stop stabbing you if you ask. This standard provides a method for a user to easily opt-out of all stabbings, except those mandated by law, and ones that the company wants to do anyways.
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Crosspost from another thread, but BOY does it fit here
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Schoolhouse Rock
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"Somehow, the future will be both a dystopian techno sci-fi hellscape AND we're gettign coal and measles and robber barons and a permanent underclass : Phillip K. Dickens."
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"fuck i'm trying to catch all these flies but they think my vinegar is stupid. i have honey also but that's for me i can't give them any of that"
management trying to hire and retain employees
I can't wait until I'm level 62!!
[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4QdsyIIxets[/video]
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Quote from: Mozai on May 26, 2025, 06:10:52 AM
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in related news (https://en.wikinews.org/wiki/Several_people_hospitalized_after_thousands_of_hotdogs_spill_following_collision_on_interstate_in_Pennsylvania?dpl_id=3019754)
(it's kind of dystopian)
An oil prospector, moving to his heavenly reward, was met by St. Peter with bad news. "You're qualified for residence", said St. Peter, "but, as you can see, the compound reserved for oil men is packed. There's no way to squeeze you in." After thinking a moment, the prospector asked if he might say just four words to the present occupants. That seemed harmless to St. Peter, so the prospector cupped his hands and yelled, "Oil discovered in hell." Immediately the gate to the compound opened and all of the oil men marched out to head for the nether regions. Impressed, St. Peter invited the prospector to move in and make himself comfortable. The prospector paused. "No," he said, "I think I'll go along with the rest of the boys. There might be some truth to that rumour after all."
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Quote from: Mozai on November 25, 2025, 04:43:09 PM
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No I'm pretty sure even the food, water, and shelter is considered "premium content" locked behind a paywall in the current modern day society
well you know what they say. when you've invested billions of dollars into hammers every problem looks like a nail and you keep handing these hammers to your users and they go "i don't really think i needed this hammer" and "but i don't have any nails that need hammering in right now" and "this is not a nail this is a glass vase that will break if i hit it with a hammer" and "didn't you used to have, like, other tools avaliable that might be better suited to this job" and you tell them to suck it up because you've replaced all your screwdrivers and wrenches and box cutters and crates and ladders and paint with hammers because your shareholders need to see an increase in value from your hammer investments
Quote from: Mozai on January 22, 2025, 05:11:04 PM
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Fuck
Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.
$30 per seat per month.
$1.4 million annually.
I called it "digital transformation."
The board loved that phrase.
They approved it in eleven minutes.
No one asked what it would actually do.
Including me.
I told everyone it would "10x productivity."
That's not a real number.
But it sounds like one.
HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.
I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."
They stopped asking.
Three months later I checked the usage reports.
47 people had opened it.
12 had used it more than once.
One of them was me.
I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.
It took 45 seconds.
Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.
But I called it a "pilot success."
Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.
The CFO asked about ROI.
I showed him a graph.
The graph went up and to the right.
It measured "AI enablement."
I made that metric up.
He nodded approvingly.
We're "AI-enabled" now.
I don't know what that means.
But it's in our investor deck.
A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.
I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."
He asked what that meant.
I said "compliance."
He asked which compliance.
I said "all of them."
He looked skeptical.
I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."
He stopped asking questions.
Microsoft sent a case study team.
They wanted to feature us as a success story.
I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."
I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.
They didn't verify it.
They never do.
Now we're on Microsoft's website.
"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."
The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.
He got 3,000 likes.
He's never used Copilot.
None of the executives have.
We have an exemption.
"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."
I wrote that policy.
The licenses renew next month.
I'm requesting an expansion.
5,000 more seats.
We haven't used the first 4,000.
But this time we'll "drive adoption."
Adoption means mandatory training.
Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.
But completion will be tracked.
Completion is a metric.
Metrics go in dashboards.
Dashboards go in board presentations.
Board presentations get me promoted.
I'll be SVP by Q3.
I still don't know what Copilot does.
But I know what it's for.
It's for showing we're "investing in AI."
Investment means spending.
Spending means commitment.
Commitment means we're serious about the future.
The future is whatever I say it is.
As long as the graph goes up and to the right.
- @gothburz
To spell this out clearly: the reason RAM quadrupled in price is because a huge quantity of RAM that hasn't been manufactured yet was bought with borrowed money to go on boards with GPUs that also haven't been manufactured yet to go into datacentres yet to be built powered by power grids that may never be built to meet a demand that doesn't exist yet to make profit margins greater than what's in the economy right now. This is because of something economists call "the rational markets hypothesis."
- @mhoye
They wanted $21/month else your own art files would be mangled.
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Quote from: Mozai on April 17, 2021, 10:24:13 PM
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This is just rage bait.
STOP using ANTI-NUCLEAR language!
DONT: "If my parents find out, they'll go nuclear!"
DO: "If my parent find out, they'll have a blowout on their offshore oil platform resulting in 4.9 million barrels of oil spilled into the Gulf of Mexico!"
DONT: "That topic is radioactive."
DO: "That topic is leaking up to 8% of its production in the form of methane directly into the atmosphere leading to the greenhouse effect melting permafrost and Arctic glaciers."
DONT: "The country must avoid letting AI become a Chernobyl event."
DO: "The country must avoid letting AI become a Benxilhu Colliery mine event, where gas and coal dust exploded kiling 1,549 people."
DONT: "I'm concerned about the fallout from this decision."
DO: "I'm concerned about the severe acid rock drainage from this decision requiring decades additional monitoring and treatment and leading to long-term health effects for people living nearby."